Ode to Springtime

26 Mar

Say what you will about the sorry state of our Union … but some things just don’t seem to matter quite as much when spring is in the air. We tend not to concern ourselves with things like the upcoming election, the economy, our current unemployment rate or the soaring price of fuel.

Yes… when spring has sprung, there is very little that can get us down…

It is light outside when we drive to work and when we return home. Daffodils seemingly pop up overnight, dotting the landscape. Gardens are planted. Lawnmowers and laughter can be heard throughout neighborhoods everywhere.

Crisp, white lines appear on baseball diamonds across America as the Boys of Summer begin their recreational reign. Birdsong fills the air. Windows are opened up, rolled down or taken out and replaced with screens… allowing the fresh air to push away the last stale remnants of winter.

It is also during this magically transformational time of year that the SAME birds who sing to you each morning whilst you rub the sleep from your weary, little eyes… also fly overhead and unleash a torrent of crap on your newly washed car.

Spiders, centipedes and other unidentifiable creepy-crawlies from the pits of hell appear as if out of nowhere scaring the $#@! out of you, making you reach for the nearest can of Raid or Aqua Net—whichever is closest.

As trees and flowers and other living things burst to life… your eyes water and sting while you sneeze uncontrollably as though having a grand mal seizure.

The ground thaws and frequent rain waters the thirsty earth while flooding your basement and turning your driveway into Monster Truck Mud-Fest 2012.

The weather warms and grows psychotic causing you to leave the house dressed in a snappy tank-top-turtleneck-wool-sweater combo, carrying an umbrella, sunglasses, gloves and scarf, rain boots, bottle of iced-tea, flip-flops, thermos of coffee, an ice-scraper and a bottle of SPF 30.

A sudden abundance of sunshine pours obscene amounts of sunlight through your dirt-brown window panes revealing how truly filthy your house is after you and your family have been trapped inside of it for 5 months straight.

The snow and ice melt away revealing dozens (if not hundreds) of dead twigs and clumps of leaves that have been deposited all over your rain gutters, flower beds and patio furniture.

The climbing mercury propels you to rummage through boxes of spring and summer apparel—and as though trapped in a nightmare from which you cannot awake—you and everyone else is forced to see your thighs for the very FIRST time since Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Year’s, Valentine’s Day and the pizza, brat and beer fest that is March Madness.

Ahhhh Springtime… We are oh SO happy to see you again!

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9 Responses to “Ode to Springtime”

  1. Woman In Thrisis March 26, 2012 at 11:26 AM #

    LOVE your sarcasm…because of you we are able to see BOTH sides of the situation. xxxooo

    • Woman In Thrisis March 26, 2012 at 11:28 AM #

      I wrote the above comment…evidently you are still logged into my computer since your visit this past week… Your Mom

  2. JT March 26, 2012 at 4:44 PM #

    Lol, love how you and Mom are so connected. Spring is here and as you so aptly pointed out, it’s here with the “Good the Bad and the Ugly” …Achoo, ahem sorry, Bless me. In the BTW dept. you should read my blog from Friday and give me some feedback :-)

  3. cravesadventure March 26, 2012 at 11:44 PM #

    Yes, the birds are horny, the wasps are busy and the buggies are emerging! Then this morning on the way to work the sun was shining and it was snowing too – ha:) Thanks for sharing & Here’s to the Little Extra Skip in Our Step this time of Year!!!

    • Woman In Thrisis March 27, 2012 at 5:11 PM #

      Haha :) Too funny Renee! It is a wacky time of year. But mostly it does feel great to see the sunshine and color starting to remerge!

  4. Donald Miller March 31, 2012 at 10:09 AM #

    Love the witty way you have with words and the humorous imagery. : )

    • Woman In Thrisis April 2, 2012 at 11:25 AM #

      Thank you so much Donald! I’m glad you enjoyed it. Thank you for being such a nice commentor. :) It makes my day. I need to follow your example and leave more of my own comments for people. You’re an inspiration!

  5. Shawdiane June 22, 2012 at 9:04 PM #

    I have to say, even though we are thousands of miles away on the globe & have never met one another, you do write how I think! Once again I agree with your mixed attitude towards that wonderful time called ‘Sring’ & how it comes with things to catch up with in the garden, after the tedious days of rain. Doug & I have just about finished, so that we can now spend the rest of the summer days enjoying our garden before the dreaded dark months appear. But, What anoys me most are the days when feeling tired & lazey, one just wants to sit & relax ‘quietly’ in ones own little piece of manicured earth, flowers & trees & then it is spoilt because all you hear is the awful loud dreaded noise of those lawnmowers, strimmers & whatever else is the latest garden gadget on the market. Why don’t these people ever leave the nice sunny days for their neighbours to enjoy nice & peacefully & instead, do all their noisy gardning work on dry but duller days, this is what other considerate neighbours do! But these crazies seem to associate a bit of sunlight with ‘oh, lets get out the noisy lawnmower & strimmers’ brigade. Bah ! :-)

  6. Shawdiane June 22, 2012 at 9:06 PM #

    Spring ! as Sring ! Sorry, slip of typing :( xxx :-)

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