Vices

So I’m beginning to wonder how healthy my occasional formula for surviving-a-busy-day-while-still-being-able-to-enjoy-the-evening really is. Let’s see… I roll out of bed (usually exhausted), and drag my ass through the early morning routine of showering, eating, facebooking, blog-posting, news-watching, makeup, hair, heels, commute. And by the time I sit down in my office chair, I’m even more exhausted.

I reach for the faithful friend that is a big, fat, coffee mug and I head across the hall toward the office fuel pump… Or rather, the Keurig coffee maker in the break room. One cup starts to perk me up and makes me feel like perhaps I will NOT flop my forehead onto the keyboard and drool all over the space bar as initially feared.

Two cups make me feel like I can begin to pick up the pace. I can actually comprehend my email and voicemail messages. I can focus long enough on my tasks at hand and begin to feel like I am climbing on top of the To-Do list, rather than lying prostrate beneath the weight of it.

Three cups enable me to operate under the assumption that I can take on the world! I am returning emails, answering the phone and taking notes while performing Photoshop miracles. I can whip out an ad layout standing on my head with my hands tied behind my back. And I am greeting everyone who walks into my office with the loudest, cheeriest and most hyper “HELLO!” that they run scared in the opposite direction.

However, by the time I get home and it is finally time to unwind and relax… I wonder why I am so keyed up. Perhaps a nice glass of wine will calm me down and ease me into the evening so that I can eventually drift off to dreamland peacefully and soundly.

So… I reach for the faithful friend that is the corkscrew. I nearly shatter my sparkling-clean wine glasses as I reach for one since my hands are shaking like mad from all the caffeine I’ve ingested throughout the course of the day. One glass starts to enable me to take deeper breaths as warmth and calm gradually spread through my limbs. I think that perhaps I will NOT bite the head off of the first person that speaks to me as initially feared.

Two glasses allow me to feel like I can begin to cope with the reality that I will have to do this all over again tomorrow and the next day and the day after that. I can relax and focus long enough on an exchange with my boyfriend / mother / father / sister / niece / nephew / neighbor / friend so that they will believe I am happy, engaged and perfectly willing to handle whatever it is they say to or ask of me without “losing it” because I am “overwhelmed” or “stressed.”

Three glasses enable me to operate under the assumption that I can take on the world! And just as I attempt to take on the world… my forehead flops onto the keyboard of my laptop and I begin to drool all over the space bar.

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10 thoughts on “Vices

  1. Loving the post this morning. I agree with Debbie above when we are in our 60s/70s we can just hit the bottle and have happy hour anytime of the day – lol:) I am looking forward to having tomorrow off so I can recharge my batteries and enjoy a little bit longer weekend, since they seem to fly by lately and the work week drags. Hang in there and Have a Caffeine and Wine Induced Day:)

  2. Oh this is so funny but really very sad actually. I don’t work because I have fibromyalgia and can’t stay out of the bed long enough to even get to work. One day a few weeks ago I had an extremely strong cup of coffee in the morning along with an herbal energy pill for menopause. I thought for sure I would be able to stay awake and be normal like everyone else. NO. A few minutes later I went to bed and slept like a baby for hours. Yesterday I went to my parents house with my daugther. It’s a two hour drive. Since I would normally be in bed I got a starbucks coffee. Hmmmm good. That was on top of the two maccha green tea bags and a vanilla one so that I could actually take a shower and get out of the house. So by the time we got to the resturant where we were meeting them my legs were fiddgeting and I was throwing straws all over the place. However I did not fall asleep at their house during the visit like I have been known to do. Home by 10 and Lunesta to fall asleep but not stay asleep. Then sleep all of the next day. Oh such is life. My husband survives on Mountain Dew all day. What is wrong with all of us? Well I know what is wrong with me.

    • UGH. I’m sorry to hear about the fibromyalgia. My mom suffers from that, althought it is not as dibilitating as it sounds like you are dealing with. I know it is a very tricky illness. I wish for you many, many more good days than bad 😉

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